For decades, we Americans have focused on the basic belief that MORE = HAPPINESS. People everywhere say, “If we could only get more, we’d be so much happier. A bigger house, closets of designer clothes, dining out every night, and giving our kids everything we didn’t have. All these things would make life better, right? We’ll have the American dream!”
It didn’t work. The more we got, the more we wanted. We started buying based on the assumption that in the future, everything goes up. Real estate values grow, our incomes rise, the stock market steadily climbs, and we have an endless ability to get more credit when ever we want it.
What we didn’t realize is with every purchase we were hurting ourselves far more than helping. We added more stress, stretched too thin, sold ourselves out. We lied to ourselves and everyone else that we could afford these things. We convinced ourselves not only that we deserved these things, but that we needed them. All the while, we kept adding more and more unbearable unhappiness.
Thank goodness that’s ending in this current economic crisis. We get a chance to get ourselves back, to become self-dependent and really be happy. This is our chance to become better people, enjoy simple things, and learn how to appreciate what we have instead of stressing about our inability to get even more.
Contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching and consulting session.
As you probably read in my last post (if not, go to 5 Advantages of Blaming first), there are lots of advantages to laying the blame for our current economic collapse on everyone and everything from banks to people with bad credit to government to the neighbor’s dog. But stop to consider – there are two sides to everything, and where there are advantages there are also disadvantages. Let’s explore the downside to pointing an accusing finger at just about anyone we can think of…
Here are some disadvantages of blaming:
- It camouflages our real problem, our personal relationship with money
- We can easily become paralyzed, scared to death to make any decisions
- It keeps our focus away from appreciating what we do have and what’s going right
- Whether we realize it or not, we loose a little self-esteem every time we blame something or someone, including ourselves, for what’s happening
- We feel we are POWERLESS to change our financial situation, let alone make a difference in the overall American economy
Although it is a common reaction to find our favorite scapegoat when things go wrong, the truth is all that finger pointing really just points us in the wrong direction. It is a knee-jerk reaction that gives us a brief moment of satisfaction, yet ultimately leaves us floundering about the world without a genuine solution.
We can either blame or stop blaming. We can empower ourselves to move forward and repair our financial relationships. Once we take responsibility for our part in our own situations, we can take power over it. This will lower our fear levels, raise our self esteem, and turn this monetary crisis in a positive direction!
Contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching and consulting session.
It’s easy to get caught up in the day to day drama of the current American economy and start pointing the finger. For instance, we could blame the media for inciting so much fear, or we could blame the banks and other financial institutions for making so many bad credit loans. We could blame the bleeding-heart liberal democrats, or the ultra-conservative republicans, or whatever part of the federal government we are angry with! Better yet, we could blame President Bush for single handedly causing everything in every market everywhere in the world to collapse.
No matter who or what we blame, here are some of the advantages of doing so:
- We have a subject of conversation that we can talk about with almost everyone
- We can get quite an adrenalin high off of the fear
- We are saved the work of actually making any decisions by staying in the “wait and see” mode indefinitely
- We could get that much needed exercise by tossing and turning in bed at night, and of course the “lift and point and lift and point” of the index finger as we assign blame
- We don’t have to take responsibility for our lives and our financial situation because, of course, it’s someone else’s fault
For the record, and for those of you who may miss the point, I am writing this with a touch of humor, but I mean every word of it quite seriously. It is a part of the human condition to want to look around for the nearest scapegoat when things go wrong. But that doesn’t actually solve any problems, does it?
As with everything, where there are pros there are cons. Check back soon for my next blog to find out about the 5 Disadvantages of Blaming…
You can also contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching and consulting session.
There is no doubt in my mind, we are going through the most challenging financial situation we have ever gone through in our lives and it’s not even close to the bottom.
The reason our financial situation will get a lot worse before it gets better is because we’re trying to solve it the wrong way. It’s not about money at all, the financial crisis is only the results of a belief most of us have that we gain at other people’s expense. Think about it – why are there so many reports of mortgages going into foreclosures and people being forced to declare Chapter 7? Everyone was looking for a short term gain. Lenders thought they could profit at other’s expense, and the lendees thought they could beat the system.
No matter how hard they try, the government can’t bail us out of this gigantic mess because it’s founded on the SAME belief. In order for someone to gain, others will have to pay for it.
Until we change our basic belief back to how can we all profit, we will continue digging ourselves into a deeper hole. When we consider this seriously, credit and interest rates will balance out, jobs and health care will no longer be cut, and America’s free market will get back on track. For this paradigm to shift the right way, as a society, we must reclaim values such as “treat others how you want to be treated.”
Contact Vickie Champion for a complimentary coaching and consulting session.
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